Saturday, October 17, 2015

Just a memory

“For something to be born, something has to go. That’s balance. It’s tough and you’d better be tougher.
“I’m not talking about when you give up something in order to make another, better, thing happen and it’s all roses and bluebirds from then on out.
“I’m not talking about giving up your life’s dreams so your kids can have the future you mapped out while you live through them - and not regret your choice.
“It’s not about cutting out the things that make you happy but are killing you, so you can live a long, long life. The whole time wishing you could still drink, fuck, numb or gorge yourself without making your way to an early grave. No, you have to crush the need completely. You have to gouge out the want.
“True sacrifice is when only death can kickstart something else into life.
“Death of an ideal, a love, a life – you choose, fill in the blank. Death is death. There’s no grey area here.
“And there’s nothing pleasant about it. Utterly destroying something will hang over you like weighted chains. It’s not nearly as freeing as we’re led to believe, this is the truth. When you excise something so deeply there will always be pain, guilt, what ifs – like you’ve cut off a limb but can still feel its presence.
It’s how you use these feelings.
“If something is sacrificed then you better damn well make sure that sacrifice was not in vain. That is your responsibility. Otherwise something died for no good reason.
“Take those feelings, twist them round. Make anger your strength, fear your ally, turn hopelessness into the rival you want to beat. Make something priceless out of them.
“Life follows closely in death’s foot prints – understand this, it’s the least you can do.
“Don’t screw this up.”